Dorcas, A Journey Begins

 Dorcas, A Journey Begins

      Hi, my name is Dorcas. I have really no idea why I am writing in this journal, but Mama said it would help to write down my thoughts, hopes, and dreams. I miss her, and papa too, my sister Patrice, and my obnoxious little brother Jeremy. I guess I need to start at the beginning, so I can remember why I am here in Skyrim and not home in Cyrodiil. I am from a sleepy little village, I will not call its name in case this falls into the wrong hands.

     You see, I am being chased by men, hired by the Count that rules over my village along with several others. Why is a seventeen-year-old girl being chased by grown men, you ask? Well to answer that I need to start my life's tale at the beginning.

     I was adopted by the two I call mama and papa, they never told me, I found out after overhearing a conversation in the Boarshead Inn and Tavern in the village I call home. I was working there to help earn gold to pay the taxes on the farm. It really doesn't matter because I love them both so much and it would hurt them if they knew that I had found out. All I have been able to pick up was a word or two over the time I have been working. People talk when they see me, thinking I am too busy to listen, and usually after enough ale to make them even care if I heard.

     Anyway, the story goes that a stranger, tall, fair of manner and skin, came to my mama and papa's farm one day, holding me in his arms like a baby. He was very polite and courteous as he explained that I was his daughter. He said that he had to go far away on the business of the 'God's'. I guess he was one of those they call on to do things for them, at least that is what the priest said in one of his sermons until the Count got wind of it and told him to never mention that subject again.

     When papa asked after my mother, why was she not taking care of me? He then replied that she had already been called to a different place and he had no one to take care of me. He had asked the Gods to help him, since they needed them both in other places, they directed him here, to the farm where I was raised, to mama and papa, who took me in as their own. Mama took me from him, never asking his name, and papa, he just looked at mama holding me in her arms and melted on the spot. Somehow I faintly remember this man before he left me with my new mama and papa, put his hand on my face, and kissed me on my forehead. Then he whispered to me, that they, my real mama and papa, would be watching over me, would do whatever the Gods would allow them to help me when I needed their help. That they loved me and I would one day come to know why they had to bring me here, to give me to a new mama and papa, to live and grow up with.

     He said to listen to my new mama and papa, but not to trust what anyone else said about how I should be. That one day the Gods might call on me as they have my mama and papa. I know now how right he was, that they did call on me, just not in the way I expected. So much for these priests in the temples, a few are true to the Gods, but most have been corrupted and led astray by the nobility. Always looking after their own interests rather than the peoples, and when they would dare say anything, the nobles either threaten them or buy them off, then use them to justify their own actions. Saying the Gods put them over us to rule our lives and show us how the Gods wanted us to live.

     I cannot believe the Gods would approve of an old Count, who takes young women and marries them, then when he tires of them, sends them away where they are never heard from again, only to start looking for the next one. This is why I am running. He set his eyes on me. Now, I know about the fumblings of young boys behind the haystacks. Went through my share of those times, although they did not get as far with me as they did with others. I grew up on a farm and therefore knew about males and females. Still, I was curious and that led to my excursions behind the haystacks. I never let them have their way with me, something inside me said to wait. It did not take long before the boys stopped coming around and truth be told I did not miss it much.

     I had mama and papa as a better example of what it meant. Sometimes papa would look at mama in a certain way, mama would lower her head and blush, later they would be alone and I sometimes heard them cry out. But when I saw them later, they were always smiling at each other, papa would put his arms around mama when she was stirring dinner in the big pot over the fire, as she would lean into him. That is what I wanted with my life.

    Maybe someday, after the Gods are done with me, I can have that life. For now, I have to put this journal back in my pack. I have to cross the border into Skyrim. I do not know where I am being led to, or what is ahead for me, that is for the Gods to let me know, in their way.

    

    I do not really know how to write about what happened after I crossed the border. It almost seems so like a nightmare, just one I cannot wake up from. I was walking along a road and came upon some wounded men. I stopped to do what I could to help and suddenly was surrounded by men of the Imperial Legion. I did what my papa always said to do if that ever happened to me, I looked for a space to make a leap through and run.

    I always wondered why he told me to do that, now I know. As I made my leap, I was through the line of men that had surrounded us. I made it a few more paces when I felt a blow to the back of my head and blacked out. When I came to, I was propped in a wagon traveling on the road. My hands were tied together, but my legs were not. I also hurt, my head, my arm, where I probably landed on the ground, and somewhere else where I am not supposed to hurt, unless the soldiers were too rough with me. If I survive this and find out who, I am going to see them hang. There are still laws dealing with this sort of thing and Legion or not, they have not the right to do what they did to another citizen of the Empire.

    I spoke to the other men in the wagon with me, even though one was gagged. Let me see, there was Ralof, Lokir, and Ulfric, yes, that Ulfric, Jarl of Windhelm. It seems he was the target of the ambush I got caught up in. Ralof was nice and respectful when he spoke to me, Rokir was more concerned about himself, I could not really blame him for that. Ulfric just sat quietly, listening but not even grunting a reply.

    When we arrived in Helgen, I was still in shock. I had heard rumors and stories of how the Legion was outside of Cyrodiil, but I did not want to believe them. Now I wish that I had, but I really do not know if it would have helped me any. We got out of the wagon and stood as names were called out and checked off of a list. When they got to me, I was not on it. The one with the list, Hadvar, was also nice to me.

    He remarked to the Captain, that I was not on his list, and asked what to do. He at least had orders and procedures to follow and did so. The Captain, however, should have asked General Tullius, since he was ranking officer. Instead, she sent me to the block with the others. If the Gods intend for me to survive this somehow, I will see that Captain discharged for dereliction of duty, failure to follow the chain of command, and anything else I can think of.

    Oh, let us not forget what happened to me while I was knocked out. As Captain, she is responsible for the actions of the men under her command. And somehow, at some time, I will see justice. I wonder if she knew and figured this was a way to clean up the evidence. I was still fuming inside when I was taken to the block. With my neck waiting for the kiss of the headsman's ax, I thought somehow the Gods had better get me out of this. I do not think they brought me all the way here just to lose my head!

    That is when I heard that eerie roar, the one that made my backbone shiver. Then I heard the word, "Dragon!", and felt the ground shift, everyone looking toward the tower, the 'block' had been set up in front of. I could not see him, but I felt his eyes on me. Why? What am I to him but an insignificant mortal? Did the Gods send him? Or did they send me here because 'he' was going to be here? Again, why?" A lot of questions and no answers, and then the fireballs started coming down from the sky.

    Oh, I almost forgot, I think I heard him speak words in some language just before the fireballs started. Why this is important, maybe I will find out later, if I get out of here. This is my chance, come on, get up! It is now or never, the Gods have given me this one chance, do not squander it. I get to my feet, and spot Ralof close by, he tells me to follow him to safety in a nearby tower. Nothing better to do than to get fried out here, so I followed him into the tower. He immediately started talking to Ulfric. I was more concerned with finding a secure place to hide and not get crushed by falling stone blocks.

    So, I went up the stairs, past one small pile of blocks to another blocking further access to the top, I was above the middle landing when part of the outer wall collapsed inward and the dragon's head poked its way in the hole and he let loose with Dragonfire. I crouched and made myself as small as possible. Was he hunting me?

    I went back down to look outside and see if there was an escape route through there. Ralof showed up and pointed out that I should jump to the hole in the burning roof of an Inn close by. As I did as he said, he told me that they would catch up to me later. I landed on the upper floor, ran to a hole at the far end that I could get to the ground through. I went outside and saw Hadvar trying to get an old man and his grandson to safety.

    Even though he was a member of the Legion that had just tried to kill me, I could not stand by and watch these two innocents get burned in Dragonfire. I went to him, and as he got the old man, I took hold of his grandson and we pulled them both out of the way of a blast of Dragonfire. He looked so appreciative of my help, that I felt something move within me. He told me that if I wanted to live to follow him.

    And so I did just that. I put my life in his hands, and he did not disappoint me. He led me to another tower, even as along the way, we were along a wall as the dragon landed on top and shot out more Dragonfire, as we stood directly beneath him. I definitely heard him speak words before the flame left his mouth. We moved on around the building wall and found Ralof with Ulfric and a few others heading in another direction.

    I first thought Hadvar was going to fight him, but he just said he hoped the dragon took all of them to Sovngarde and bade me follow him to the building ahead of us. As we made it through the door, he had me come over to him and he cut the bindings from my wrists. I do not know why I did what I did after that, but I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him. As we parted I whispered, "thank you", even as the astonished look on his face faded and more immediate needs came forth. He had me look around for weapons and armor, and I managed to find some that at least somewhat fit me. I also grabbed a couple of swords and we continued onward.

    We had to fight our way through to the outside, mainly Stormcloaks, but there were some Frostbite spiders, a couple of them were big ones too. I remember Hadvar commenting on what would next, giant snakes? I would rather face giant snakes than more spiders. There was a mother bear trying to settle down for a winter's nap, so we just quietly ran past her and on out through a cave. We heard the dragon roaring as he flew around looking over the wreck of the town of Helgen. Once he went off into the mountains to the west, Hadvar and I started out to Riverwood to see his Uncle Alvor.

    I do not know what made him ask me to consider joining the Legion. I mean they almost took my head from my shoulders just for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. But I do agree with him that the Legion is the best option all around, especially if the Thalmor renews the Great War. But I do not have to make a decision right now on that. We got about halfway to Riverwood when I heard a cry for help. Hadvar did not hear it and kept going. I started to call him back but for some reason, I just could not do it.

    It was a woman who had called for help, I asked if she was hurt but she said no, someone else was. So she took me to the wounded girl. I carefully picked her up, so as not to cause more damage to what she had already suffered. Mercifully she was unconscious or she would likely have screamed from the pain and drew every wolf in hearing. We avoided a Thalmor patrol looking for the girl in my arms. 'Rose' as the woman was called took me to a friend's camp where she had a boat tied up. I placed the girl inside, carefully climbed in myself, and took the oars. Rose steered with the rudder, while I rowed. It did not take long to get to her camp along the southern shore of the lake, where I picked up the wounded girl and took her to the camp.

    There was an open lean-to, with some blankets on the ground. So I gently put the girl onto the blankets and stepped back for Rose to look over her wounds. She had been very lucky when her stomach caught a broken limb on her way falling down through the tree branches. She was seriously hurt, but her stomach was intact. We just had to keep her warm, watch for fever, bandage the wound to keep it clean, fix something that she eat to rebuild her strength.

    Which meant I needed to go and get some things from the Riverwood Trader in Riverwood. Rose was kind enough to give me the gold for the stuff from the trader, so I took the boat across and went on foot to Riverwood. I ran into some Thalmor at the entrance to Riverwood, having an excuse about seeing a man about a dog ready. I got past them and went on to the Trader. I reached the door and saw an armored Dunmer woman arguing with a Thalmor Justiciar. I kept myself looking at the door while listening to the conversation. I was not really eavesdropping, they were loud enough for the whole town to hear.

    When she got to the part where she told the Thalmor to get himself and his people out of town and not to stop until they passed into the next province, I wanted to clap my hands and stamp my feet, but better not to draw attention to myself. Inside the Trader, the owner and his sister were real nice, taking care of what I needed and wishing me good luck. There are still good people left in the world, we just need to find them.

    I took the stuff back to Rose, who used them to bandage Rigmor and cover her with the fur to keep warm. She then sent me to someone she called Anise, to get a 'nettle' potion, a cabbage, and some venison, then go back to Riverwood and drop Rigmor's cuirass at Alvor's to be repaired. I learned that Rigmor of Bruma was the girl's name from the 'wanted' posters the Thalmor had put up all over town. Fifteen thousand gold reward for her must have really twisted their knickers to want her so badly. Anyway, I do not care to give anyone over to them for any reason. Rose and I talked a little while watching Rigmor sleep.

    Both of us were a bit guarded in what we said, considering everything going on, I understood completely. She did finally tell me about a treasure supposed to be up on a mountain ledge above us, but no one who had tried to find it ever came back. We decided that if I try for it and get it we would split the gold. I really wanted to get it for her to have a chance at another life somewhere else. I did not need it, as long as I am on a mission for the Gods, they will take care of me, after all, they got me out of Helgen alive.

    The trek up the mountain was strenuous, with switchbacks, winds, snow, and Frost Trolls. No wonder no one made it back, but I was motivated to get that gold for Rose. So I took it easy, watched my footing, fought each troll alone, and made sure I had a better tactical position. Finally made it inside, and what I saw was so worth the effort. I read a letter sitting there with an admonition about the reason for taking the gold to not be selfish, or the blessing of the gold would turn into a curse.

    Whether it was true or just words, the meaning was true for me. I had seen what some would do to others for gold, and I had no intention of keeping it for myself. Also, I thought Rose's need would ensure it remained a blessing. Going back down was much quicker than climbing up. I gave the gold to Rose, who was speechless. When she did recover her voice, I simply said that I did not need it and that she did, that was good enough for me.

    She felt that she owed me for all of what I had done and for the gold. So she kind of hinted around if I would like to sleep with her. I politely told her that I would never take advantage of her like that. That all I did, I did without thought of payment of any kind. I did profusely thank her, so she would not think that I thought badly of her. I did want the chance to spend the night with her, but not like that, not because she thought she owed me anything, but because we wanted to share ourselves with each other.

    Rose looked at me, stunned, then I saw a tear fall from one eye, making its way down the side of her face. I felt something then, I still to this day do not know what it was, but right then I stood up and went to her. I caught that single tear before it fell to the ground and placed it on my tongue. It was both so sweet and so bitter. I could see how jaded her life had made her, but I could also see how she had nearly given up hope of ever finding someone who wanted her for her. Someone who wanted to share themself with her, totally and completely.

    I looked into her eyes, pierced through the veneer she had grown to protect herself from the world. And I kissed her. After we came up for air, she said, "I have searched for so long for someone like you, I had almost thought I would never find you." Her words struck me in my heart. I still remember what I said to her at that moment. "Rose, I want to share myself with you, the first time I have ever felt that. But I do not know what lies ahead for us both. I will understand if you cannot or do not wish to commit. I...I would ask you for this night with me, after that, let the Gods decide if we stay together. Will you..." She wrapped her arms around me before I could say anything more, and kissed me. She was gone when I woke up the next morning to Rigmor's attempts to get me to wake.