The Search For Kathea, A Leap Into The Keep Of The First Ones P1

   Meyrlyniq again nods her head.

     "Your sister, the 'Mother of the Cosmos', nudged events in just the right way, at just the right time, to set it all in motion, and did it by saving my life from Sithis. Somehow he knew she was going to choose me, and so he thought to get to me first. What exactly he had in mind, I really do not want to know. Truth be told, I do not care.

     But I see why she did what she did. If I had the choice she had, knowing what I know, I would have done the same. And so I cannot blame her for what she wanted to do. It means life, for Life's sake, everywhere Life exists."

     A second voice, tender, gentle, and sad as well, "thank you, Iriisii Dovahkiin, for being who you are."

     Meyrlyniq starts at the second voice, and a pale slender figure, with common features that could be anyone you have ever known, materializes.

     "Meyrlyniq, this is the 'Aspect of Life', as I have her to thank for my mates and my children, I would ask that you respect her as I do."

     "All of the time I have existed and never have I thought."

     "There is an 'Aspect of Death', you have seen ample evidence of him have you not?"

     "Yes, but.."

     "Then it makes sense that the opposite would also exist, for without 'Life' there can be no 'Death'. He told me some time ago that you watched over me as did he. Thank you for that, I know that many take your presence for granted, know that I do not. I serve you and your brother, as I serve the 'Balance', for you are all intertwined together. Each depending in some way upon the other."

     "I am glad 'Wisdom' has not withheld his hand from you, for you are indeed a worthy student."

     "Now there is an 'Aspect of Wisdom', how can this be?"

     "I will speak to you of this once, listen. The powers that watch, interact, listen, speak, every aspect of life and death within these Creations. Of all, the greatest powers, are Hope and Faith, when enough people believe, the force of that belief is real, it has power, force, energy. It follows the very same process that the 'Mantles' did in the beginning when they were formed. It is simply that then there was not enough belief to cause the creation of a 'Mantle' for that Aspect. As the populations of the Realms grew, the power available grew as well. It does not get apportioned out to those already in existence. It pools until there is enough to form a 'Mantle' for the thought that sent that power outward to wait. And so the numbers grow and are maintained, as long as there are enough who believe to keep them empowered."

    "I never..."

    "How could you, you were virtually imprisoned here since landfall. Only by experiencing what is out there could you learn of the panoply of Gods, Aspects, Avatars, Mantles, that exist. I have more than one that I carry myself. The very first one I received was as the 'First Horseman of the Apocalypse', 'WAR'. That was the one I received shortly after coming here when my trace was diverted from the one Sithis desired for me. One that the 'Kel' prepared me for. As that 'Aspect' I and my brothers are 'agents of change'. Sometimes violent, sometimes not, sometimes small, sometimes large, but always needed.

     Some things I am being called, I have yet to delve into the real meanings of. But this I do know of them, enough numbers who believe have gathered together, and the pooled power from their belief has placed itself upon me. This will undoubtedly cause me to have to address something, fight something, even kill something at some time in the future. And I will have to deal with it when it is required of me.

     As I have reached higher and higher among the planes of power, the chains grow ever more cumbersome. It is no wonder that your sister now seeks someone to take those chains from her, to release her from the burden. As much as they weigh me down, I also understand why it must be this way. For the kind of power I speak of, unrestrained, in a single body, is perhaps the most frightening thought imaginable. I would not want it under those circumstances, for I could not trust myself not to abuse it."

     "And here speaks one, who first-hand knows the price that ultimate power can cost. If it were not chained, all would seek it, and chaos would rule supreme. Until the very fabric of reality could stand the pressure no more, and the failure of all 'Life' would ensue. Her overriding desire to serve 'Balance' is her highest calling, her most important task, for the 'Balance' is what allows for 'Life' to continue between the extremes of 'Good' and 'Evil'. 

     Yet she does not allow herself to forget who she once was as a mortal. She remembers the simple cares that almost all those of power either never knew or allowed themselves to forget. And so maintains a tie to those who in turn gives her the power to keep 'Good' and 'Evil' at bay, allowing mortals the chance to live their lives, raise families, know 'love', and pass their knowledge to the next generation.

     She gives of herself to others in need, and in return is filled with even more to give. Whether it is gold, a kind word, healing, a gentle touch, what comes back to her is far more than she gave out. Would that more learned the lesson as she has. This is but one side to her, for she must balance that side with other more base givings. To those who take, she stops their hand. To those who delight in suffering, she gives them suffering in return.

     But to all from high to low, good to evil, if any seek redemption, she extends her arms, ready to give it. She is what we need in our next 'Mother of the Cosmos'. I and my brother, stand by her side, walk with her through light and dark, through tears and joy, through laughter and sorrow. We are 'Life' and 'Death', once we looked upon her as our child, now we see her as our sister, equal in all things to us, and one day we will see her as our 'Mother', one we will gladly serve however she needs us.

     Perhaps regrettably, the 'Power of Prophecy' is not done with you yet, it sees you as the answer to problems that have plagued it since time immemorial and problems that stretch for so far into the future, there are no words that describe what awaits there for you, for all of us, mortal and immortal. Know that we two will be there to stand by you, as will many, many more.

     It is now your task to forbid the knowledge that rests here from the hands of Sithis. For should he acquire it, all is lost, all life everywhere, here in this Creation, in the other Creations, in the Outside, and even the Beyond will fall, never more to return, or be reborn. All who know the meaning of the 'Balance' will follow you, many of 'Good' and 'Evil' have seen their error in judgment, in blindly following those they have. They now see the truth, that you are the true path, that you stand for all who will stand with you. Gather them to you, protect them, show them the 'Balance', let them see what they truly wish to see in you.

     For this is your time, your 'Age', your 'Aeon', your 'Epoch', the 'Time of the Balance'. Let Ragnarok usher it in for you, then make of it what you will."

     Iriisii stands stunned by what she has at first intuited, then learned of what she intuited, means for her future and the future of Creation.

     "Who or what is this 'Ragnarok?"

     "Perhaps both 'who' and 'what' describe 'Ragnarok', perhaps neither. Ragnarok is a true 'force' yet still guided by the 'Fates'. He is one of the 'Greater Mantles', like the 'Mother'. As Alduin was to be the one to consume the 'Kalpa of Mundus' and then to bring about its rebirth. So it is for 'Ragnarok' to be the signal for the rebirth of Creation, all of them.

     He presages the new 'Mother', brings forth the 'Four Horsemen', the agents of change, and empowers them to be his arbiters of change. He will force all who live within the Creations, to declare which side they choose to follow, whether they be mortal or immortal. They must choose either 'Good', 'Evil', or the 'Balance'. Then he will declare himself for the 'Balance' and tell the other two to prepare for the Jihad of Truth, for the Holy War of Truth.

     Once the war is over, and the forces of 'Good' and 'Evil' lie in defeat. He will carry the 'Daughter' upon his back to the 'Mother'. When the 'Mother' will give over the "Mantle of the Mother of the Cosmos' to her 'Daughter' who will then become the new 'Mother'. Then the Creations will be reborn, for although the other 'Mantles' change their holders to perform the duties that are required of them, the 'Mantle of the Mother' does not. Rather it is the Creations themselves that are reborn and reordered, to meet what the new 'Mother' requires.

     This is what "Good' and 'Evil' fear the most. For they must give up who they are and what they have become to be what the new 'Mother' wants them to be. There will be forces outside of the Creations that will attempt to take a hand in this. Whether it be for their own fears, hopes, dreams, desires, or for reasons unfathomable to us. They will have to be dealt with as well. And then there will be Sithis.

     He is and always will be. That does not mean he is omnipotent, supremely powerful, yes, but still he can be defeated. And you will need to defeat him in order to force a pact with him. This pact will declare the terms by which the two of you will coexist. If either breaks it, the power rebound will do great damage to the one breaking the pact, thus making way for whatever punishment the other decides and can enforce.

     That is in part why he so desperately wants to stop you. He knows that the knowledge you seek could conceivably be used against him, effectively sealing him off. And so it makes certain that he will abide by the terms of the pact, to prevent this from happening. He does not want to be in a position where anyone can force anything from him. If you defeat him, and I feel certain you will, then seal him away, not to be released until you decide to step down for another. Perhaps by then, he will be more amenable, or maybe not. But that will be for your successor to deal with, along with whatever power, knowledge, and abilities you grant to them."

     "That is much to think about, maybe too much right now."

     "You have those who follow you that are capable of taking small parts of this load from you. You do not have to shoulder it all alone. Reach out to those who truly trust you, want you to succeed, those who care that you overburden yourself, let them help you."

     "You are right, it is past time I began to delegate some of this. I thank you and value your counsel, if ever you feel I am swaying from the path, tell me that I may correct my path. And I add your brother to this task as well, for I have come to respect his wisdom as well as his restraint."

     With the decision made, Iriisii feels on more solid ground, that things look a little brighter than they did just a little while ago.

     "Meyrlyniq, when I take the 'Wisdom' from here, will Sithis then leave you alone? I ask because as long as this has been held from his grasp, I cannot say what he will do."

     "I have also wondered this if he would allow me to leave or not. So far I have been able to fend him off, but if he does not have to worry that I might do something with the 'Wisdom', he might as I have heard it said, take the gloves off, with me."

     "Do you have the resources to stand out against him indefinitely then?"

     "For a while, yes, but I think in the end, he will have the victory."

     "I see, then let me make this offer to you. I have possession of a machine weapon, actually much more than a weapon. It is large enough that I can dock an entire fleet of starships of every size inside it and still not come close to reaching its capacity. I have need of a separate 'command and control' place that can be used to direct the ship's activities in the event the main one is compromised. From what I have seen of it, your 'keep' would do the job very well."

     "How would you connect it into the main systems?"

     "Not a problem, the 'Krang' can likely take care of that itself. I would direct it to make the necessary connections with the smallest amount of modifications needed. I would also like to allow it to offer any upgrades to your 'keeps' systems that you may wish to avail yourself of. At least you can refill your fuel systems, should they ever be needed again."

     "I would be honored to be of whatever help I can be, especially if it helps protect me from Sithis."

     "Good, when I wake I will direct Reaper to have the 'Krang' look at what would be needed to bring this about. It may take a little time, but we will get it done before I leave. I will not leave my 'Aunt' in Sithis' hands. Hmmm, I have never had an 'Aunt' before, it feels right though."

     "And I never thought to ever have a 'niece'. I too like the sound of that."

     Just then Iriisii feels a sense of anticipation come over her, trying to see where this is coming from.

     "Something wrong?"

     "I have a strong sense of anticipation from somewhere."

     "Do you know of anything that is happening or soon to happen?"

     "I...think, maybe...oh Gods, not now!"

     "What is it? Can I help?"

     "I do not know, the Fourth Dragon comes seeking her host, and I have no idea who it is."

     "The Fourth Dragon?"

     "I have had inside of me, nearly all of my life, the soul of the 'First Dragon of Destiny'. He tries mainly to let me do as I will, only coming forth in times of great peril to me. When Akatosh first bestowed an ancient Dragon Soul to me, he did so with the purpose of anointing me to be his 'Dragonborn'. A hero to be sent into the world to fix problems no one else can, problems that if not stopped could cause the destruction of Nirn. I think, the 'Mother' arranged for the soul he used, to be a different one than the one he thought he was gifting me with.

     There are four Dragons of Destiny, two male, two female, each seeking a host of the opposite gender. The Second and Third have awoken and found their hosts. I spoke the ritual for each to merge themselves, but I do not know who the host is for the Fourth. All I know is that she comes to me, therefore her host is close by."

     "All this time in this Creation and I never heard about them."

     "I do not know when they came if they are a part of these Creations or from somewhere else. I have really not cared about that at all, for I have felt how great is their 'caring' for these Creations. But by all that is holy, these memories, I do believe that now that I have Ascended', my memories have, I think, become alive."

     "How so?"

     "When I think back over things that have happened, things I did not put much effort into remembering, they are now full-blown, every detail, every thought, every word, clear as the clearest sky. I remember the first time I laid eyes on Rigmor."

     And her memory takes over.

     "I first remember waking up, hands tied, sitting in a wagon with three other men, all in bonds as well. I heard one sitting across from me speaking to me, as I awoke."

     "You there, you awake? You were crossing the border, weren't you, got caught up in the Legion's snare just like we did. I have to admit though, you fought better than I would have imagined."

     "For a woman?"

     "No, I have known plenty of women warriors, some of the fiercest I have ever met. But none of them would be able to match you. It took five Legionnaires to bring you down, and I swear I thought you were going to break out of their hold if the Captain had not brained you with the flat of her sword. Where did you learn to fight like that?"

     "My grandfather taught me in the beginning, after that, well, it really doesn't matter now, does it?"

     "I guess you are right about that."

     They introduced themselves, but I said nothing. They did not question my desire to remain nameless. I did notice the one to my right was gagged as well as bound. The one across from me, Ralof of Riverwood, said he was Ulfric Stormcloak, Jarl of Windhelm. The other man, a horsethief from Rorikstead, went on about how he should not be there, and that if the Legion had captured Ulfric, where was the wagon taking us? I could have answered that for him, but Ralof in his own way beat me to it. He said that although he did not know what town we were heading to, he knew our ultimate destination was Sovngarde. Although I was fairly certain that was not where I was likely to end up.

     It wasn't long before we entered through the gates of a town. Ralof said it was called Helgen, all I knew or cared about was that it was likely to be my final resting place. For some reason I did not question why I was in this situation, I felt deep down that this was justice for things I had done years ago, even if I had no literal control over myself, still there was a price to be paid.

     When the wagons stopped, we were herded out to stand in a line while a legion soldier marked off each name on his list. Then he came to the horsethief, he did something incredibly stupid but at the same time, I felt it was very brave of him. The horse thief took off running saying that the Legion wasn't going to kill him. But they did anyway, an arrow in the back will do it every time. Strangely, I thought, I understood why he ran, he knew they were going to kill him. But he made them do it on his terms, not theirs. And so I vowed that when I got to where I was going if there was anything to drink, I would hoist one in his name. And if any demon, devil, or whatever had something to say about it, they would find out just how dangerous I could be.

     The soldier with the list, Hadvar was his name, he saw that my name wasn't on his list. He asked the Captain what to do, and she said the prisoner goes to the block. Hmmph, with the General there, and this Captain did not ask him what to do. Military bureaucracy at its finest. 

     One of the prisoners was called and he went proudly forward. The priestess started to give last rights, but he said he had no time for that, he just wanted to get it over with. It only took a minute or two for the axe to come down and his head to roll around in the dirt. Then they looked for the next, without even hauling the still bleeding body away. Incompetent as well as stupid. I guess that was when the Captain thought of me because she made sure I was next.

     I went up to the block without a second thought, I knew deep down that if I truly did not want to die, there was no way this bunch could do it. If they truly knew what I was capable of, they would have had me in chains so heavy I could barely walk, and then they would be using ropes to pull me into whatever position they wanted. No one would want to get within an arm's reach of me. As I lowered my head to the block I heard a strange but familiar, what scream, cry, I did not know what it was then, but I was to find out very soon. 

     The headsman lifted his axe, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw a huge black dragon land on top of the tower looking down at what was going on. I felt something inside as his eyes looked at me, I swear he knew something about me, and it scared him. How do I know that? He only had to wait and watch the axe fall, yet he looked up at the sky and shouted some words. Dark, fiery clouds swirled and fiery meteors began falling out of the sky.

     What was a simple execution turned into mass panic. I guess the Gods had something else in mind for me rather than a beheading. I stood up and saw Ralof gesturing for me to follow him. I went to him and began following him to a tower close by. As we entered, I looked around and decided if I was going to survive this I needed to see where that dragon was. I went up the stairs that ringed the inside of the tower, making it just above the first landing, when that dragon burst his head in through the wall and let loose with fire. Lucky for me he was looking downward and I was above him but was he tracking me somehow, and why?

     He pulled out and went elsewhere to do some more damage, I went down to look out and see what was around there. Ralof came up and pointed out the roof of an Inn within jumping distance. He told me to jump, make my way to the far end, down to the ground and he would look for me. So I looked, decided where I wanted to land, and made the leap. I hit the second floor, ducked and rolled, came to my feet running to the far end where I dropped to the ground.

     As I watched and waited for Ralof, I saw Hadvar, another older man, and a young boy. Then I saw the dragon land and look toward them. I knew he was going to fry them. Ralof and the older man had cover to duck down behind, but not the boy. Suddenly I heard myself cry out, "no, not again, never again", and I raced to the young boy, opened my arms as best I could with wrists bound, slipped my arms over him, and told him to hang on. I then raced to where Hadvar and the old man were crouched, shock on their faces as they watched me scoop up the boy and get him behind cover just as the dragon let loose with fire. Thinking on it now, I believe that is why Hadvar told me to follow him if I wanted to live.

     We reached another tower and he cut off my bonds. We looked for whatever we could use and took off deeper and down to look for a way out. Along the way, we met other legion people and stormcloaks as well. The stormcloaks were not in a mood to talk and attacked us on sight. We defended ourselves, of course, had they listened to reason they just might still be alive. When we came out the far side through a cave. We could hear the dragon still flying around. We crouched up under a rock overhang until he tired of destroying the town and left.

     On the way to the next nearest town, called Riverwood, he showed me a couple of places on the way, a collection of three standing stones, one for a thief, one for a mage, and one for a fighter. He encouraged me to touch one and I chose the fighter. I noticed a feeling of power rush over me, and I saw a pale beam of blue light shoot up into the sky. Onward he showed me 'Bleak Falls Barrow'. He told me a story of when he was a child he was scared that something called a Draugr would come out and look for him. It never did, he said, but he never forgot that.

     As we came closer to town we met a group of Thalmor, who are a political faction of the Aldmeri Elves. It seemed they were looking for someone, but they most certainly did not care for our presence and moved us along. As we came up upon a hillside, I heard a young woman call for help. Hadvar did not hear and kept on going to town, while I stepped off of the road to see what the problem was and if I could help.

     The woman had seen a young girl jump from a cliff and into a tree to avoid some people chasing her. As she dropped through the branches she hung one on her abdomen and nearly opened her gut on it. The woman asked if I could pick up the girl and carry her to her camp to safety. I took one good look at this young girl and I swear I could almost see myself in her. I picked her up and followed the woman to a fishing camp where she had a rowboat. I placed her inside and we took her to the woman's camp.

     After getting her settled, I could see the scars she had over her body. They were whip scars, I know those when I see them, and I swear it was like they were speaking to me, telling me the story of what had happened to her. I felt a deep connection to her at that moment, she carried her scars on her outward body for all to see, I carried mine inside, where I never let anyone get close enough to see them.

     I ran some errands for Rose, as she introduced herself. When I got back and sat down while Rose put a wolf pelt over her to help keep her warm, and made something for her to eat. Afterward, we sat down to talk. She was very reticent about her own past but not as bad as I was about mine. 

She complimented me on my willingness to help without compensation. I just said that is who I am, willing to do whatever I can to help someone less fortunate.

     It was not too much longer when she 'pulled the rug out from under me'. She offered to 'sleep with me' to compensate me for what I did. What I did next was so difficult for me, that I wonder where I found the strength to pull it off. I turned her down. 

     "Rose, please do not take this the wrong way. No, hear me out! I think you are so beautiful, when I look at you, the temptation I feel is stronger than anything I have felt in a long time."

     "But you are not going to take me up on my offer, are you?"

     "No, I am not. If the circumstances were different, crap, Rose, it is just not fair to you, for me to involve myself with you, even for a single night. You are very beautiful.."

     "You are not into women, is that it?"

     "I go either way, but I have not been with anyone for a long time, it was no one's fault, really, but it did not end well. And now...when I do give myself to someone, I want it to be forever. I want them to know all of me, the good and the bad, mind, body, and soul."

     "I knew you were special when you came up to help, I just did not expect it to go as deep as it does. That just makes you even more special, you know that don't you?"

     "No, I am not special, really I am not. Well maybe a little, only because you say so. But, really I am not involved with anyone. I am just trying to find out what my place in this world is. And..."

     "And what? Come on, tell me what has you tied up in knots."

     "I am being chased, all right! I am sorry, I.."

     Rose gets up and sits down next to me, puts an arm around me, "it is all right, you don't have to say anymore. I could tell something was eating at you, unfortunately, it wasn't me."

     I laughed at that and felt somewhat better. "Thank you, I needed that. But, someday, if the Gods bring us together again, if neither of us is involved with someone, I would like to try this conversation again."

     "So would I, and maybe by then, both of us might be ready to settle down."

     "If you would, go ahead and sleep, I will stay up and watch her, when I get tired, I will just lay close to the fire."

     "I am sorry, I did not intend for that to happen."

     "No, it is quite all right. It gave me a peek inside of what made you the person you are. There are not many I can think of who could do what you did, not to mention how you did it. And I feel that every word you spoke to 'Rose' was the absolute truth."

     "Honestly, when I did finally see her again, I was married to Rigmor. Talk about a real tough situation to be in. Seeing Rose again, brought everything back, and being there with the two of them together. Let me tell you, I would rather have been on a battlefield, in the middle of a pitched fight than sit and listen to them talk about me. Wondering if one was going to say something to set the other off. Not to mention that Rose found an excuse to 'show me around Bravil'. Do not get me wrong, I did want to see the city, but I dreaded having to explain the twists and turns my life took since I saw her last, that found Rigmor and I married. 

     As it turned out, I feared greatly for nothing, she understood without my having to go into a lot of detail. I look at my life and the directions it has gone in and I think it was the right thing for me to marry Rigmor rather than Rose. I do not think Rose could have handled everything that has happened. Maybe I am wrong, but maybe I am not. At least this way, she has a chance to find someone."